Quote of the Day

I’ve somehow managed to avoid seeing the horrid-looking Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo, though I still curse Touchstone for sticking its trailer at the front of High Fidelity every time I watch the DVD. I firmly believe the rest of humanity should join me in my avoidance of this film.

Unfortunately, that quest just got a lot harder, as Columbia Pictures has inexplicably not only financed, but actually consented to distribute and promote, a sequel, unimaginatively titled Deuce Bigalow, European Gigolo. (What, did the Olsen twins’ production studio write the title for this crap?) Patrick Goldstein, movie critic for the Los Angeles Times, in a piece about the 2005 Academy Awards’ Best Picture nominees, lambasted Columbia Pictures for passing on several highly decorated movies to produce said sequel, saying:

[Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo] was sadly overlooked at Oscar time because apparently nobody had the foresight to invent a category for Best Running Penis Joke Delivered by a Third-Rate Comic.

This did not go unnoticed by Rob Schneider, who apparently took offense at being accused of making a running gag of penis jokes. Schneider took out full-page attack ads in a couple magazines questioning Goldstein’s credibility, notably stating:

Well, Mr. Goldstein, I decided to do some research to find out what awards you have won. I went online and found that you have won nothing. Absolutely nothing. No journalistic awards of any kind … Maybe you didn’t win a Pulitzer Prize because they haven’t invented a category for Best Third-Rate, Unfunny Pompous Reporter Who’s Never Been Acknowledged by His Peers.

Roger Ebert has seen the sequel, and his opinion ain’t pretty. We now get to the quote of the day:

As chance would have it, I have won the Pulitzer Prize, and so I am qualified. Speaking in my official capacity as a Pulitzer Prize winner, Mr. Schneider, your movie sucks.

(via Lee, who has his own take on this whole stinky mess)

posted by Chris on 13 August 2005 at 2252 in humour


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